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Classic Dykes Online,‘The cybernetwork for lesbians in mid-life and beyond’ 
By Robert DiGiacomo

Living in Seattle at the time, she was in her mid-40s, was a recovering alcoholic, and had finally come out after being divorced twice.

“I was coming out, and was using online resources—the bulletin board at that time was about all there was to meet people,” Abney recalled. “I guess I had an angel because I found her there.”

Forward to 1999, and Abney is still on the Web. Now, she’s not looking to meet that one special someone—she and her partner, Corie, live happily in Vancouver. Instead, she is the founder and editor of her own site, Classic Dykes Online -- www.classicdykes.com --  a Web area for lesbians who define themselves as being mid-life, and want to claim a place for themselves in our youth-oriented culture.

“I wanted to promote the visibility of mid-life and old lesbians on the Web,” Abney said. “There’s very few Web sites dedicated to this group, so there was a need. That’s why I call Classic Dykes Online ‘the cybernetwork for lesbians in mid-life and beyond’—it’s exclusively dedicated to the mid-life plus dyke.”

Among the features on the site are Love Bytes, a matchmaking service with personal ads, the Latebloomer Chat Room, and the Classic Dykes Message Board. There are also links to LGBT resources and Latebloomer Stories, a collection of coming out stories and personal anecdotes from site users.

“As far as I know, Classic Dykes Online is the only comprehensive site dedicated to lesbians in this age group,” Abney said. “There are a handful of other limited sites for aging lesbians—like “The Loft,” a very active message board for lesbians over 40—but, to my knowledge, none offer the same scope of content or services.”

According to Abney, the popularity of Classic Dykes—the site is averaging about 400 hits a day—is largely due to its interactivity.

“[That is] where the real soul and interest is,” Abney said. “I’m hoping to make Classic Dykes even more interactive. It’s just mind-boggling really that we can touch each other through this media. If this had been available when I came out, it would have saved me so much pain. People are isolated and they don’t have to be.”

Especially dear to Abney’s interests is the Lesbian Latebloomer list, an online support group she started in October (1998) for women who come out later in life. Limited to 50 members, the list’s membership roll includes women from Finland, Germany, Australia, Canada and the United States.

“I sure wish it had been around when I was struggling through my own lateblooming process at age 46,” said Abney, who notes that members on the list range in age from 36 to 67. “A couple of late bloomers who initially met on the list have actually fallen in love and are enjoying a ‘real time’ romance, so hope springs eternal.”

Abney is also hopeful that the lesbian presence on the Web—from that one message board she dialed up six years ago to the thousands of sites today—will continue to grow.

“My sense is that there are lotsa dykes out there in c-space,” she said. “It seems like the number of lesbian message boards, chat rooms and e-mail lists have exploded over the last couple of years—not to mention personal Web sites.”

The numbers for her site have also zoomed upwards in recent months. About 23,000 visitors have stopped by Classic Dykes Online since it debuted in June (1998), but recent traffic has reached about 400 hits a day. Abney also has an extensive waiting list for Lesbian Latebloomers.

That level of interest shows the demand for content for lesbians of this often overlooked age group, although Abney believes Classic Dykes is the only game in cyberspace.

“Initially, it seemed like 100 to 1, gay sites to lesbian sites,” Abney said. “It’s still dominated by men, but gee the women’s visibility has really increased. But it’s still youth-oriented. As far as I can find, and I’m constantly looking for anything on aging issues and mid-life lesbians, there are chat rooms, and there are individual sites, but I haven’t run into that comprehensive site yet. I think Classic Dykes Online is one of a kind so far.”

SOURCE: Philadelphia Gay News, March 26, 1999.  Robert DiGiacomo is a Philadelphia-based writer. Send comments to dragnetpgn@aol.com.