Coming Out Age: 34

Story:

     Proned to be a feminime looking bisexual but have
 not publicly claimed it because I have not engaged
 any dating or physical relationship with  women.  Most
 people assume I am straight, except the women who are
 attracted to me.  I notice patterns.
      From age 34 - 36, I noticed a pattern of myself
 gazing into another woman's eyes numerous times at
 various occasions and silently flirting as I was smiling
 and waving at her her across the room.  She is a layed
 back quiet, masculine looking woman.  The flirting
 was mutual.
From age 34 - 36, I also noticed an aggressive,
 outgoing, talkative, dominating masculine looking woman who
 comes on to me with these intense conversations.  She
 can come across as being intimidating, overbearing and
 a gun-ho lesbian.  She puts me on a pedestal.  She
 singles me out from the rest of the people in a group.
  She even gave me her business card.  Her body language
 signals to me that she is turned on by me.  Her
 pupils dialate and she wiggles her body around and appears
 to be aroused, and I have never seen a woman act that
 excited about me before.  I have mixed emotions of
 happiness, shock, shame, anxiety and embarassement around
 her.  She even gets jealous when my boyfriend comes
 around me and follows me around.  She shows no interest
 in my boyfriend, just interest in me.  She does the
 initiating.  She is the aggressor and I am the passive
 one.
Age 29 - I was walking through aisles of coatracks and
 gazed at this handsome man across the room for
 atleast 30 seconds without stopping and he was stairing at
 me the whole time it was love at first-site and I never
 felt this attracted to a stranger before.  As I
 walked past the coat rack he was standing behind, I scanned
 his lower part of the body and realized he was a
 woman when I saw her hips and no genitals.  I was shocked
 and could not believe I was that attracted to a woman
 and assumed she tricked me into believing she was a
 man and blamed her for it.
     In earlier there were women trying to hook up
 with me and I just concluded they were lesbians and that
 I was straight and nicely avoided them and turned them
 down.  As a teenager there were a couple of intense
 girls who were attractive and had intense
 personalities, but I would avoid them because I felt anxious around
 them.
     My personal life I have been having autosexual
 affairs with myself and had my first ejaculation at age
 35.  I also engage in fetish activities for
 self-stimulation.  I have never had an ejaculation with a man
 before.  
   Conclusion I am still attracted to men even though
 things are happening to me with women, so I concluded I
 am proned to be bisexual.  I have to get over the
 anxiety and my naiveness about it and I feel like I am
 two people being pulled in two directions.  My childhood
 was an alienating suburb where everyone appeared to
 be straight.  
     At the age of 8, my family became conservative,
 born again christians and started attending church.  
 My upbringing was not exposed to liberal or
 homosexual atmospheres.  A lot of my thoughts are programmed by
 this religious background, so there is deprogramming
 process I may have to go through and sort out.  After
 all this liberal stuff is against what I was raised to
 do and become because it is a sin that could result
 in eternal damnation in hell after death.  Despite of
 my upbringing my homosexual instincts, come out.  It is
 still questionable what I will decide to do in the
 future.